hmmmm.....

Love. They say that it is the most important in our live is it?. Once your true love came just hold on it don't ever to let it go because true love comes just once. Don't regret it. But sometimes finding our own true love comes to a long journey. Sometimes it will get hurts and not easily at all. It will make you feel that you can't breathe. There's a tie in this world. They say that in love once you break up with your special someone if your really meant for each other you will meet again soon. No matter how hard to try to avoid it, the hurts it will comes to you. Sometimes when you find the one there is always struggle and make suffers because of the hurts. No matter you try to avoid it still your self pushing you to fight for it. There are times that it will make you coward because there are reason. Sometimes you just need to give up for it. But still if your destiny is really for that person it will really come to you. "First love never dies" but sometimes our first love is not our true love. Some people experienced this they will let go of their first love and soon their true love will come without knowing it. First love can dies but you can treasure it. You may forget it but you can treasure it as memorable part of your life. Sometimes the person that come to our lives, our true love is the opposite of our self.

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Im crying all the time

I am crying all the time. My heart was crying all the time. Now my heart is becoming a stone and it started to feel nothing because of the hurts that they make me feels. I don't want to be like stone. Stone that never feels anything but this is what I feel. It's so hard that your the only one who needs to understands what they feels but the feelings the hurts that you feels they never try to understands. My heart, my self, was just like starting to fail. I wanna stop my self and my heart to cry and forget anything and just pretending that it's not happen but it's so hard. I wanna stop the hurts and take it away. But it's not that easy. I'm pushing my self to be strong but I can't. If only hat my father was here I can cry to him to take all the pains. I thought from the very beginning being the only child was OK but I just realized that is not that easy. Because they expect a lot from you. They expect me to be perfect. It's just like that they expect me to be PERFECT IN EVERYTHING!!!. I'm not perfect. I'm just a person who also trying her best to be good as they want. They never listen to what I am saying to what I want to try to explain to them. There's nothing I can do about it because I don't want to forget that they are part of this life. Sometimes my heart was started to shout out all the feeling here but I'm scared. If only I can make a magic and magic my self to be perfect but.............I just want to stay as me and whatever goes on inspite of all the pains the hurts I wanna learn something new fromthis things. I'm so tired of this. I just want to leave it to God beacuse I know he is going to do something with this Life. But still my heart was crying and I know that it will never stops.

My Best Friend

I miss my best friend. We never get along with each other since the day we both graduated in elementary until now. But sometimes she sent an email to me. Even if how busy we are in our studies we still best friends and nothing has changed. Actually we never forget the birthday of each one. Sometimes she went in our house and we were just eating a lot of donuts. We talking a lot about the things that happened to us. She's like my sister and she's the only one that i given my whole trust. She knows everything about me. Now I really miss her a lot. I wanna share everything to her about the things that happens to this college life. Of course I wanna know what happen to her too. I miss her so much.

i hate this

I really hate this person . I really hate him so much!. He is my "STEP FATHER"!!!. I don't know if this is right but this is what I feel. Even though he's the one who give something for my studies. He's so not open minded person. He always thinks that he's PERFECT and he knows everything!. He never listen to what we just say. I hate that kind of a person. He treats me and my mother like his made and his the king. I really hate him a lot!. If only that my father was still here I will not experienced this feeling..I just want to tell this to my mother but there's nothing I can do about it. He loves that person. And she's happy but the problem is I don't like the way he treats my mother. Im just only a kid to their eyes that's why for them there's nothing I can about anything!. Some time I just don't wanna talk to this stepfather. He never appreciate what mymother doing for him. He doesn't say thank you. He don't know how to appreciate things. Just only his work is need to give appreciation for him. Thats what I think that's what I see. But even though I'm still the person who never forget to gives respect.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TOME!

Happy happy birthday to me. I really have fun. I really feel my birthday today. It's so nice to be with someone that your comfortable with. I love car bumper. It was very fun. I love my new puppy her name is "Miss Felicity". If I'm going to have a choice I want this day to not end. I'm getting older now. There's alot of changes now in my life. It's my first day to celebrate my birthday in this college life. It feels so different in my high school life. Now I'm trying everything to be more responsible. But sometimes my mom gives me a lot of pressusre. Now I need to be more open minded person in my new world. It feels so good in TOMS WORLD:D. I really love it. I love collecting tickets. I love cokefloat. I really don't want to end this day even if it was just a short time I really enjoy.

Highschool Life? or College Life?

Last friday in our values subject we talked about if what could be the most happiest moment in our life of being a student is it "highschool life?" or a "college life?". Well its a very nice topic and half of my self makes me emotional because my mind brings back all of the memories that happened to me when i was in highschool. Memories with happy moments, achievements..and ofcourse sad moments and friendships. Well i just miss all of that moments. But half of me, think that it's just only the start of my journey in college life. It's time to move on and to be matured. All of that memories in my highschool life, i'll just keep it and treasured it. We'll never know, what will happen to me, to us in this college life and" just go with the flow!". So for me that topic that we discussed last friday makes me feel really good and such an interesting topic.